Oh we mean well, don’t we? Most of us do our best to help others when we can. The problem is, most people help others because it makes them feel better. If they didn’t get the positive reinforcements of thanks, they wouldn’t be so willing to do so much. Be honest with yourself now. What is the real motive, deep down inside, that drives you to do good for others? Forget that dogma taught by your religion and go deep inside. When you do you might be shocked to find out that you are really stroking your own Ego when you give to others.
It’s the Ego that feels betrayed and it usually starts with: “…and after all I did for them! How dare they! “Yes, that is Ego, rearing its’ ugly misshapen head. It feels betrayed when the thank you’s stop and the person you are helping goes away without so much as a ‘by your leave’. Even worse, if the person you helped starts talking smak about you and telling others what a real pain you are. They might even warn others not to accept your help because there are strings attached.
Betrayal of love is even worse. When the one you love finds another, our hearts are wounded, aren’t they? Even if you no longer wanted that person, do you find yourself feeling betrayed and jealous when they find love again? Ego rears its head again as you start down that road of recriminations. If that person dares to continue doing something you shared-with the new person-the feeling of betrayal intensifies.
Evidence of betrayal can be found all around, from the person who tells another something you shared in confidence, to the cheating lover. The confidence thing is easy to fix; get over it. The person probably forgot that it wasn’t to be shared. Stop telling people things you don’t want to get leaked out to others. The cheating lover is another thing: use better discernment next time. Especially if your new lover is cheating with you, what makes you think they won’t also cheat on you?
Betrayal starts within each of us and has to do with Ego. Mind your own inner business, control the Ego, and don’t share intimate secrets that you don’t want others to know. Most of us are just a bunch of gossips and can’t be trusted with something really juicy; when we gossip on ourselves and it gets out, whoa–don’t we just get upset? Learn to laugh at your gossipy self and realize the fault lays with you, not the nosy friend that talks too much. They are just more out in the open about it.
©2010 Dr.Valerie Olmsted All Rights Reserved
Dr. Valerie Olmsted is an author, naturopathic physician, metaphysician, internet entrepreneur, artist, speaker, and lover of life. Life coaching and counseling are offered via the website at http://www.BeWhoYouReallyAreCoach.com.
Contact: Dr.Valerie Olmsted
2370 W. SR 89A
Ste.11-#121
Sedona, AZ 86336
928-257-3290
