He, however, is not receptive to her negative emotions. Whereas she has committed to the relationship early on, he has not yet been thinking about a future together but is just going along enjoying the ride. Her dissatisfaction is not really what he wants to hear as it interrupts his having fun during the dating process. “Why does she have to make things so heavy?” he wonders.
Often this can lead to a cooling off by the man, who resents her demands and negativity. This intensifies the woman’s insecurity and, if she then panics and starts chasing after him for fear of losing him, she can soon find the dating process terminated abruptly.
A woman needs to realise that allowing herself to become emotionally committed to a man before he feels that way himself can be a recipe for disaster, as it leads to frustration and unfulfilled expectations. These generally prove too much for her to contain. Emotional fireworks often ensue which may damage a potentially fulfilling relationship beyond repair.
It is therefore better for a woman to hold back and let the man take the lead on where the relationship is headed. She can let him show her that he considers her worth making an effort for. She should help him to value her as she values herself – as an emotionally strong and balanced human being who does not give herself away easily. If he doesn’t then show enough enthusiasm towards her, then he is not the one for her and she can get out with her heart intact.
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