They’re a bunch of friends of mine who’re online and looking out for the ‘just right’ person. They’re all doing well professionally and have pretty much run out of people to meet in the ‘physical world’. Every single one of them meets an interesting person ever so often, but the realization these friends of mine have come to is – there’s a whole world full of people out there, and it’s possible to reach out to them online. Thus they’ve taken the plunge, into the ‘slightly uncertain’ world, of online dating. Since this is turning out to becoming quite a popular trend, I decided to do some looking into the safety of the entire process and spoke with a few of these friends. Here are some of the tips I’ve gleaned for remaining safe, when dating online.
Your online presence – how personal is your ‘personal space’?
Limit your personal information to the bare essentials. There are a whole lot of unsavory characters out there in the online (both men and women) that prey on unwary people. Use an alias instead of your name and never give out your home telephone number. It’s also advisable to create a free email account which you could dedicate to your presence on a dating site. Never, under any circumstances should you give out any financial information. The virtual world is fraught with opportunists who would quickly and efficiently manage to take advantage of any information that would dip into your finances. This would include your not giving away security questions that correspond to e-mail or bank accounts.
Understanding a person’s inner-self – via IM
There are chat and messaging interfaces available on most dating sites. examine, understand and utilize these features extensively to begin and maintain contact initially with someone you like. Look into the psychology of the person you’re communicating with as far as you can reach via the means available to you online. Fashion a list of questions that you would help you understand a person better and make sure you bring these up during chats. You should grant that questions you ask may be put to you as well and you should not ask something you’d not answer yourself. Always check if the portrait fixed on a profile is the most recent one, and you actually should ask for the most recent picture of the person you’re communicating with. It’s advantageous to obtain as many pictures as possible of the person you’re reaching, so that you’re clear about the looks of the person before proceeding further.
Taking the online relationship forward
One of the most important tools you’ll come to rely on, is to trust your instinct. Every person who’s self aware is capable of making a judgment that’s based on instinct. Use your instinct to the hilt, and you’ll be able to discard people you’re disinterested in right away in this way. But, don’t let your instinct let you put down your guard either. After you’re reasonably sure that you’re comfortable with the person you’re communicating with, it would be essential for you to speak with him/her. Follow the same procedures for verbal communication as you would through online means like chat and e-mail. Do not reveal where you live, and do not provide any information that would allow someone to track your whereabouts. Get yourself a separate phone number that you can dedicate to your online dating. This should preferably be a mobile device, so that you may carry it around with you if you decide to meet the person you’re communicating with.
The initial rendezvous
Once you’re secure that you’d like to meet with a person (and this may last through quite a few meetings with the person), see to it that your is somewhere with people about. Places with a continuous stream of people would include a coffee-shop or a bistro. Meeting a person for the first time can be unnerving so having people about eases the nerves too. With the numerous tactical services built into the premium services on dating websites, it’s always advisable to go in for a paid package, especially when you want to keep security at the forefront.
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