If you have had a break-up, you’re probably either trying to either trying to work out how to get over the person, or ways to win back lost love. Neither is really easy, but most people fall to one or the other, with only only a few in a position to move on quickly without pining or wishing things could be different. You should really think hard about the relationship and your ex before you do anything. Think about how things were and how they will be now. Try to be as unprejudiced as you can. You could decide that the break-up really isn’t a bad idea.
If you make a decision to attempt to win back lost love, the first step is to say sorry. You might think you have done this. You may have said you were sorry many times. But if your ex thought you were apologizing solely to stop a split, she’d not assume the apology was sincere.
If you were the one that did something you need to apologize for, say sorry again. Now they might think the apology is sincere, because nothing hinges on it. If the relationship has ended, you won’t be announcing it only to reserve it but they will believe that you actually mean it. ( And hopefully, you do.)
When your ex was the one who did something worth apologizing for, then instead of try to get a sincere apology from them, forgive them. You can never forget, particularly if your split was because of cheating, but you have to learn to forgive. Forgiving is much tougher for some of us than just announcing, “I excuse you,” though, so you might want to read a book or two on forgiveness and the way to truly mean it. If you want to win back lost love, this step will help you do it. And it can help stop issues in the future, too.
If you do succeed and you win back lost love, 3 or six or 9 months into the recently patched relationship, old issues might come up. If you have not forgiven the person for whatever was done to break up the relationship, then you may have a hard time getting past everything. Old injuries would be reopened and it is possible that malicious things would be claimed.
But if you can really pardon the person, then there will not be any necessity to rehash the past. While you are working on forgiving him or her for whatever occurred to cause the break up, forgive them for the break up itself and you can save yourself lots of grief down the line.
Also, to win back lost love, show the person the “you” they fell in love with, not the “you” that has been dumped. They were with you because you have certain qualities-kindness, thoughtfulness-not because you are indignant, envious or hurt. While you might not be able to hide the hurt, concentrate on being the best “you” you can possibly be and you may win back lost love by reminding them why they loved you in the first place.
